The Relationship Afterlife

Everyone in their lifetime has been through this stage at some point in their life whether it was a young age or at the present moment, but no matter what the case as I stated before everyone has been there. You've just experienced a bad break up, a broken heart, or you're running searching for the right mate. Let's pause for a moment and analyze exactly what I'm saying to you. You have been with ur mate for about 10 months, and you find out that your mate has cheated on you. Right now, you're probably feeling devastated, and you are in a state of shock. According to you, the relationship was going great and there were no apparent issues. But then, your subconscious mind starts speaking to you, and you start wondering was there something you could have done differently. All of these random thoughts starting formulating in your brain and all you can do is wonder. This is the point where you start experiencing what I like to call "the relationship afterlife". The reason I call it the "relationship afterlife" is because up until this point you were indulged by your relationship with your mate. You were dating, having sex, taking trips, meeting family, etc. Now here comes the moment of truth, and the big question hits your brain. You ask yourself this particular question here, "What am I going to do now?" For some people it's an easy road, but for others this road is tough. Forget the people who can bounce from relationship to relationship let's focus on the tough road. You have just broken up with your mate of 10 months, and you're left vulnerable to the outside world. You want to date, but you're cautious because you just got out of a really bad relationship. You put your guard up, and you don't really expose too much information because the wound is still fresh. You start partying more with your friends jumping from club to club, engaging people to fill that void, and you even create a little blackbook of new contacts to date. All while this is going on in your life, you never take the time to really and truly deal with your emotional hurt. You consume yourself with multiple tasks, exercise, movies, or whatever hobby you have just so you don't have to think about your relationship. This is why I call it the "relationship afterlife." It's a deep scar that haunts you forever until you deal with it. Some people even take it as far as having "friends with benefits", "cut buddies", or just some person u casually have sex with on a regular basis. No matter what you title this aspect of a friendship, you still haven't tackled the real issue at hand. What do you do with this huge emotional scar you have on your heart? Are you willing to let the next person you want to start dating know about this emotional scar? Do you feel they have a right to know about your past experiences? These are questions you have to tackle in order to move forward and have a successful relationship after your break up. The "relationship afterlife" is something that can consume you, and you can also get so caught up in it that you may overlook a person who was waiting to help you heal your wound. So before you get caught in the "relationship afterlife" take the time to deal with why you're hurting now so that you can focus on your next relationship and give your all. Until next time folks....peace!!!!